Toward the end of each week, I look over my “to do” list and start thinking about what needs to get done the next week. I tend to ignore the things I’ve done that week, and instead focus on the unchecked tasks, with a sense of frustration, stress, and self-criticism.
As a therapist, I've found that people often focus exclusively on the things they have NOT done, or have not done well. Mistakes made, tasks unfinished, and so on.
It's probably human nature to focus on our problems and shortcomings. But there's room to also look at the things we are proud of - the successes and small victories we might take for granted. Doing so can point us toward our strengths and our values, and give us a more full view of ourselves.
Think back over the past week. Rather than focusing on all the things you didn't do, write about your successes, big and small.
🖊️📖 Reflect back on the past week. What did you do that you feel proud of?
🖊️📖 What did you do well? How did you use your strengths?
🖊️📖 Did you make any choices or decisions (big or small) that had a positive outcome?
🖊️📖 What do your answers above tell you about your values, and about what's important to you?
🖊️📖 What can you learn from this exercise that might guide you in the future? How can you build on these behaviors?
🖊️📖 If you have trouble thinking of anything, write about what gets in the way. Might you tend to be self-critical? Can you take a moment to make room for your successes, big and small?
Happy writing!
I’m a clinical psychologist, co-host of Psychologists Off the Clock, and author of the books ACT for Burnout and ACT Daily Journal. You can find me online at drdebbiesorensen.com.
Be sure to check out my writing prompts here and my 30-Day Journaling Challenge, with guided audio exercises here!
Last Monday, I had an appointment with an editor about a children's book I self-published earlier this year. At first, I reached out wanting advice on how to promote it, but after we talked, she made me realize the book might not be as good as I thought (or still think) it is.
It’s a simple story based on my cat, Willow. When I first brought her home, she found a dog toy that was almost as big as she was, and claimed it as her own. She still carries it around to this day when she wants me to go to bed — basically telling me it’s bedtime, lol.
The editor’s advice was to unpublish the book and start over, especially since I’ve been thinking about making a whole series starring Willow and her friends. But honestly, there’s just something in me that can't let my little book go. The story is mine, even though the illustrations were made with AI. I know the drawings aren’t perfect, and some people look down on that — but it's still my Willow captured in a book.
So right now, it’s still out there for sale. If I do move forward with the series, I’ll probably make it even more of a tribute to her — maybe turning Willow into a talking cat with a crew of friends to make it more fun and kid-friendly.
I was so nervous for that appointment. Even though it was online (thank goodness), the introvert in me panicked for days beforehand. But I kept the appointment. I stayed calm even when she told me to unpublish it. (Later, yes, I cried — but I’m a crier at everything, good or bad. Probably why my therapist suggested writing years ago.)
And now I’m putting my writing out into the world. WHAT??? Yeah, shocks me too. But honestly, I’m proud — proud that I kept the appointment, proud that I listened without falling apart, and proud that my little book is still standing, flaws and all.
Thanks for asking such a beautiful question — it made me realize I have more to be proud of than I thought.